By: Andy the Angry IT Guy

Editor’s note: This is the thirteenth in a series of posts we’ll be running from “Andy,” an anonymous IT administrator working for a mid-sized organization located somewhere in the American Midwest. Today, Andy flexes his creative muscles and shares his experience dealing with a server going offline earlier this week – shamelessly set to the tune of an old Christmas standard…

Twas the week before Christmas, when our main server went down

“This is really going to suck,” I said, sporting a great frown

I went to the server room, to check the root cause

Feeling my colleagues’ wrath as I walked past – it was unceasing, without pause

I was nearly to my destination, when who should jump out?

 But Jack, the new sales guy — an insufferable lout

 “Hey Andy,” he sneered, his voice dripping with scorn

 “Why’d our computers all break? What, were you watching porn?”

 “Why are you even here? Shouldn’t you be bro-fisting and pounding Jaegermeister all day?”

 … Would’ve been a great counter-insult; it’s what I wanted to say

 Instead I just shrugged, and brushed right on by

 To the data center I went, to have a private cry (It’s not easy, after all, being the IT guy!)

As I wiped at my eyes, I surveyed the scene

It looked bad, really bad… a long night loomed ahead, filled with lots of caffeine

The server was fried; the router was shot

I thought about just quitting right then and there, leaving that stupid server to rot

Exchange was on there, so were Adobe and SQL

Without these apps running, there would be lots of angry people

It was amidst this despair that I suddenly proclaimed, “Whoa!”

“I can just migrate these VMs with VMware Go!”

My problem was soon solved, with laughable ease

Setting up a new VM and migrating the apps was a total breeze

The process took minutes – not an hour, not a week

My holiday was saved, I was too happy to speak

Now, you may be wondering, did my colleagues express gratitude?

Of course they didn’t! Like always, they were aloof and quite rude

But I couldn’t have cared less, that’s right I said it

I can now spend Christmas week at home, with Xbox and Reddit

With that, I’ll sign off and wish you all farewell

As I finish this lament about the job from hell

Happy holidays to all of you, from Palo Alto to Prague

And please do keep reading my rants on this blog!

See you all in 2013!

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